Overreacting. That’s what I do best. This weekend was no exception.
I knew I had a lot on my plate this weekend. In fact, I thought one of my responsibilities was last Saturday so I went ahead and panicked about that last week! But when I reread the email I realized my mistake in the date and breathed a heavy sigh of relief.
My responsibilities this weekend were plentiful and overwhelming. Sometimes my instructions were vague. Other times I seemed to be needed in two places at once. In all that was required of me everyone knew I was in charge. I didn’t feel ready to be in charge.
Heath told me many times to take it one day at a time and one activity/responsibility at a time. Don’t you hate when your spouse is right?
After a workout with Julio, I had a new mindset. I stopped worrying so much about the enormity of the whole picture and started focusing on each step as it came up. This allowed me to appreciate each moment for what it was rather than anxiously anticipate my next move.
I thought I had analyzed the ever present element of surprise. Until a real surprise actually hit me like a ton of bricks.
I came home from a convert baptism of a child in our Primary a little after 1:00 pm and found Parker asleep on the couch. Mother’s intuition freaked out while flashes of moments from this summer bombarded my mind. The sleepiness. The unexplained crankiness. The times he seems to use the bathroom more than normal. Every moment seemed to have a logical explanation.
While he had gone to a fun Primary water activity that morning, the activity was only one hour. There didn’t seem to be any reason why he should be zonked on the couch before we had even eaten lunch.
So I checked his blood sugar – 168. Not alarmingly high but certainly out of range for a non diabetic. Heath tried to calm me down by saying Parker had fruit snacks 45 minutes earlier. I knew he had at least two otter pops at the water activity over an hour earlier. Fine. Maybe it wasn’t out of his system yet.
We went to TGIFriday’s for lunch. The boys had earned free kids meals by reading 20 hours in the library’s summer reading program. Parker ordered the highest carb lunch I think he could have picked. He didn’t eat all of his macaroni and cheese. But he did drink a lot of strawberry lemonade and he ate all of his fruit. Tons of sugar in his system.
Two hours after we finished eating I checked his blood sugar again – 209. I cried. And cried. Every time I thought I was done I cried some more. Sunday’s responsibilities in Primary were no longer a concern in my mind. Parker was all I could think about.
Heath and I had an argument over it. He told me that maybe the numbers didn’t mean anything. I yelled at him that it doesn’t work that way. He was trying to tell me I was jumping to conclusions and that I’m not a doctor. I thought I knew exactly what was happening and I didn’t want to wait until Parker’s immunization appointment on Friday to inform the doctor’s office.
The next two hours were spent mourning. I didn’t blame myself. I wasn’t scared. I just knew what it all meant. I always hoped if any of my kids had to get diabetes that they could be much older.
I checked Parker’s blood sugar one more time before dinner – 112. The high end of normal for a non diabetic. I stared at the number and didn’t know what to think. In all honesty, I was annoyed that Heath was right. I hate when he’s right! So I tried to continue the emotional turmoil inside by telling myself it was a little strange that Parker finally came into range four hours after eating.
This morning I got a fasting reading on him – 84. Totally in range. Huh. Now what? I really hate when Heath is right! I really really do!
When Parker sat on my lap in Sacrament Meeting and told me he was sleepy I couldn’t help but wish I had an extra lancet with me to test him again. I asked if he was really tired or if he was just bored. Just bored, he said. Ok, that’s what I thought . . . but still.
For now the plan is to bring this up with the nurse on Friday when Parker is getting the rest of his immunizations and hopefully not getting another infection from it! I have three blood glucose meters, approximately 400 lancets, and thankfully a huge stock pile of test strips. If I decide to freak out again I can always test his blood sugar and call the doctor.
It’s funny how I worried about one thing this weekend and got over that by worrying about Parker. But it seems Parker is ok for now. Not to worry. (no pun intended) I am a master at creating mountains out of molehills. Molehills so big they are capped with snow!